& I can't talk to

& I can't talk to the person I want to about it because her dad is really sick. & I can't hurt her anymore.

I'm so sick of hurting

I'm so sick of hurting the people I love & care for. Sometimes it would be better if I weren't here. But I can't do that

Dear L, I burned today.

Dear L, I burned today. For the first time in a year and a half. I'm sorry, but it felt so good. I'm so sorry, to you.

I get weak under it's

I get weak under it's power. The power of simply holding a blade in my hand.

Gah ^^

I hate how confused I am. I hate it with a strong burning passion. I have such strong feelings for her and for him. They're just strong feelings in two totally different ways. I don't know what to think. I don't know what to do. A friend told me not to worry about it for now. Someone else told me to just live in the now. I don't know what to do or think...